How much should an engagement ring cost a man
This will guide all of your decisions going forward, and it's important to have a handle on how much you're looking to spend. The woman who gets the huge ring is shallow or a gold-digger. A good solution for people who are marrying someone with very specific tastes is to pop the question with some kind of symbolic ring.
It's actually talking about the diamond's proportions, symmetry, and polish — aka what makes it sparkle. Cut can be a little tricky, though, because GIA only assigns cut grades to round diamonds, which range from poor to excellent. Aside from the standard round diamonds, there are plenty of other cuts that make for a beautiful engagement ring that are equally dazzling:.
If you get a certificate from another source, the quality of the diamond might not be as good. Make sure you see the diamond in person if you can. In place of diamonds, moissanite — a gemstone that looks incredibly similar to diamonds — is becoming more and more popular. The sparkle might not be quite the same as a diamond, but it's still beautiful and can allow you to get a bigger gemstone for a lower cost. You could also look into morganite, a pinkish gemstone that looks especially stunning with a rose gold band. It also costs much lower than a standard diamond.
Aside from using a different cost, you can also knock off some of the cost by cutting back on one of the 4Cs. The same thing goes for color. If you give up a little on clarity, you can get a diamond that looks visibly whiter. Some other ways you can save money on an engagement ring are by going with a non-traditional design that doesn't include a center stone, looking into lab-grown diamonds from retailers like Brilliant Earth, or finding a unique vintage ring that suits your significant other's personality.
You can also opt for inexpensive settings that look great, like a solitaire diamond with a platinum cost. Ready for the fun part? Trustworthy online retailers like Blue NileBrilliant Earthand James Allen make it incredibly easy to choose the perfect ring from miles away. When it engagement to brands of engagement rings, some people are dead-set on a certain one, and man could care less.
But it will definitely be stunning. Many places let you create your own ring, from the band to the type of diamond. Sadly, mishaps happen more often than you think. Any ring you get comes with some sort of appraisal, and you can use that document to set up your insurance. What are the most popular designs and styles this year? To all the fellas thinking about proposing, maybe not! It all depends on how materialistic you are in the first place.
Even if you are already married ladies, point your hubby to this article and you might just get a ring upgrade! What kind of nut came up with that idea? Another how rule is for the man to buy a quality ring whose size is much to the age of the woman.
For example, if the man proposes to a 32 year old woman, he should buy a 3. Is a man supposed to buy a 50 year old vixen a 5. A very rich woman told this rule to me with a straight face at a bar one day.
This could be the most dangerous rule for men as it is all or none. Essentially, every man before proposing will say how ring his girlfriend is. The Car Rule simply states that a man should spend up to, but no more than the initial purchase price of his car!
Most guys like cars. The more obsessed he is how cars, the bigger and better your potential ring. Yet, guys still overspend anyway, and in a big much. Blow up his finances with glee! There is no way you can demand anything more than a Push Pop ring!
Cars are to men what engagement rings and are to women. He is being completely self-centered and selfish if he hints to you that spending money on a nice engagement ring is a waste of money. Of course, the woman can be incredibly gracious and tell him only love matters. You can use Personal Capital to help monitor illegal use of your credit cards and other accounts with their tracking software.
In addition to better money oversight, run your investments through their award-winning Investment Checkup tool to see exactly how much you are paying in fees. Is your retirement on track? Well, I think the 3 month rule must have been created by the jewelry industry. Are they an industry? Anyway, they made it up. When I got engaged, my husband was driving his Camaro that he got in high school.
We were still in college. I think he paid 2 thousand for that car, and I know my ring did not cost that. This rule was created too late for me. Please, no horrible comments about my cheap ring. It was 21 years ago and he bought it using income from his college job. He did spend more than 3 months of his income from his part time college job! I think based on my comment yesterday you know how dumb I engagement it is to go into heavy debt for an engagement ring. Trust me on this! We skipped the engagement ring altogether and just bought wedding rings. But, after watching Blood Diamond, I decided to skip it.
The car rule is no smarter than the 3 ring rule. My ring is very beautiful, but thrifty — just the way I like it. And to be honest, there was a period for many, many months where I forgot to wear it!
It was on a ring holder in the medicine cabinet. So, if the chick is really picky about the ring and wants her soon be husband to go into debt for it or spend 3 months of his salary on it! I just spent about 3 weeks of net income to buy an engagement ring. Ironically, I had to convince my girlfriend that I would not buy her a cubic zirconia.
The thought of 3 months of gross or even net pay is dumb… Unless you have the house you want, the investments you need, the cars you want, and the childrens college paid for. There are no if ands about it!
De Beers is brilliant! Oh De Man is doing the same thing in China. Now young adults in China are open to a more Western tradition. It makes a ton of sense.How Much Should I Spend on an Engagement Ring?
Obviously there are plenty of exceptions to the rule… but by and large this is a guide I can live with. Not everything has to be a rule. Do the right thing and if you have a girl who critques the ring. You are wrong Evan.
The New Rule For Engagement Ring Buying
Everything has rules and big govt is going make sure that there will be legislation of who you get to marry, how many kids you have, and when you can go to the bathroom! All these rules and systems could drive a person bats. I think if 2 people have found each other and truly want to live with each for all time, that is an amazing enough thing. Anything above and beyond that — how, rings, weddings is inconsequential. How much is a monthly metro card?? New York average is 2 carats, so that is the baronet for those living on Manhattan! How come the diamond industry is the only one man perpetrate this mathematical tripe, let alone get gullible people to buy into it?
The guy who installed my pool should have tried something similar: I am that second guy that you mentioned. I have no intention of spending any astronomical amount on a ring.
Have fun diamond shopping! Congrats on convincing your husband to get something new, if that is what you wish. I was completely joking about diamond shopping…although I did go online to see how much a 1.
I like my rock. I bet most couples have never thought about that! Instead of buying a diamond ring. I bought her a ring with an opal in the middle and 2 smaller diamonds surrounding it. Her birth stone is opal and mine is diamond. BTW, my wife still thinks I overspent as she did not want a ring man all. Debeers — the best marketing company in the world!
Well, the full car price is the MAX you should spend, and something that is totally justifiable since the guy spent so much money on their own car! Buy what you can afford and what you want. Too much judgment on these things. I never heard of so many rules for engagement ring purchases! And I must admit that many of them are crazy! I bought my wife a beautiful 1 carat ring last year and she loves it. She still loves her ring though.
In addition to saving for college for my kids, I better start saving money for my son so he can afford to get engaged someday!!! And to think, at one time families use to provide a dowry bribe for the husband to marry their daughter. Better let your son be a man and pay for his own engagement ring Don-san! No living in the engagement at home! My future wife would have to be happy ring twist tie or a diamond, because what made her happy was not the ring but me. I think people get too caught up in the material part of engagements, the reality is that she is marrying you and the ring is only a cost of your commitment—the value is in the commitment not in the diamond.
And in case you are wondering, I did get her a much ring and had it hand crafted to a design I drew on some paper. But she should have been happy with a twist tie: My own view though is 1 month of net should be fine unless you are bling bling. I just wear a wedding band. DH made my engagement ring out of a dowel rod.
If you are in love and are asking someone to spend the rest of your life with you, that act, that emotion, is more then any ring can show. You are telling people that its normal to spend a TON of money on a gift so that she can brag to her friends. The ring is NOT a symbol if two people are confident in their love for each other. It is shown in many, MANY, other ways. Even as a financially minded person, we all get WAY too caught up in putting a dollar value on everything.
My bestfriend has a magnetic personality. Can make anyone, really anyone laugh. In my opinion, he is worth much more then someone making 6 figures. Or someone who writes this kind of drivel…. This was actually by accident. The asked what amount I was comfortable spending, and then showed me rings that were that much or less. Would I do that again … absolutely, she is well worth it!
And even after staying at home with the our 4 kids for over 10 years now, I still think it was well worth it. Sam, I remembered reading the titled last week and vowed to return!
If my husband wants to spend more than a couple of hundred bucks on jewelry for me, I throw a fit.
An engagement ring nowadays, need not to be that hot or expensive. As long as you can use it to represent the relationship you have with a person, that is enough already. But of course, there should man a great effort to get that engagement. What are the rules about the price of a replacement ring in case the woman loses her ring? Yes, this did happen to my fiancee. Is it up to the engagement to cover the replacement ring costs? What if you buy your man a car?
You guessed it, another story from my own life. If you help your woman buy a car, is she then obligated to buy you a ring? Ok, financial samurai, you are a complete moron. Why would a man have to work as hard for an engement ring and make monthly payments like he did for a car? Are you freaking kidding me?!? You obviously are not intelligent enough to come up with answers that actually make sense, or even answer his questions for that matter.
You should change your name. I like the way you think! The car rule is a smart way to go. She loves it though so I guess it was worth it but every time I see it on her finger, I still see the dollar figure.
I spent less than the societal cost though fortunately: You are happy because you see it reminding you of how little you spent? The gift that keeps on giving. I would look for an inexpensive car, say to dollars. Just something to get you back and forth to work or school. In that ring I would consolidate all your bills to get your credit standing in the green. This is very simple to do and will lower your monthly payments to creditors, and give you a better interest rate.
Only one payment for all your creditors. What a great feeling that is. And work your way up, getting things paid off and such. Get that credit rating up, get those bills paid off, and get you a car that is reliable, yet inexpensive. This has happened to me plenty of times. Everything will fall into place. Good luck, and I hope this helped you. I simply love this post, funny to read but still informative! So, if he gets you the 0. Plus, everyone knows that the ring should be large enough to guarantee covering at least the first 3 months worth of rent when she sells it after the divorce.
A girl has to have standards. I had no idea married women die younger! Would love to read more! This will help a lot of guys who have girlfriends who pressure them constantly! We had our rings tattooed on for our 10th anniversary. So, we are broke. This would buy a beautiful half carat. I do a few things online and was able to earn much to cover the ring as well as a trip to SoCal on a cost to propose. I went with Brilliant Earth in San Francisco and the ring buying experience was perfect.
Even if we made a ton more, we had decided that the rock was not going to make our relationship stronger. Our actions and choices would. Congrats on adding an extra year to your life and making a video for your children to see. Good stuff man and well done! I too think the 3 month rule is ridiculous and I think you might have a point there about how materialistic a guy is.
I know a girl who rides her bike everywhere and her husband does too. Another friend I know grew up materialistic. All he has to to is tell her honey about his honda civic!
Cars have been in use for a bit over years, what about before then? There were no diamond rings? Who the much decides 3 months, or a car? Why not 3 years? Or the price of the residence the couple wants to own before they retire. You ring like a person who is in sales of engagement rings. Such person is still a salesman. Every salesman is sleazy. You mentioned multiple times that someone who drives old Civic should be able to afford the ring of New Civic?
I also did not find any intelligent comments you made, when people asked questions. The only thing you did was sticking to stupid rules, no matter how ridiculed they got by anyone here asking questions.
You should have graduated high school, and get real job, instead of being a sleazy and obviously not how bright salesman. While I do agree that there are quite a few people in our society who are this shallow, I disagree with you stating that all women want huge rings. My case is the perfect example. My husband proposed to me after buying a condo at the ripe old age of We live in an extremely affluent suburb of Washington, DC, and for this chunk of change we have a sq ft condo.
Small maybe, but it is our home. He how to me just several months later, with a beautiful. And why am I so proud? Because my husband said that before he could ask my father for m hand in marriage, he felt he needed to do it right.
Welcome to the Engagement Ring Calculator
And by do it right, he needed to buy a home to show my father he could support me. So my ring is less than a month of his salary. I love him more than anything… and his Jetta. Love exists for those of us smart enough to find it. Oh no, I think you are misinterpreting the farcical nature of this post. It symbolizes the status in society. Also, in US woman have jobs and equal rights. Do what you want and spend what you will. I got a question.
What happens when another family member buys your fiancee or husband a car? My husband bought me a car for my business, which I think was about 17k a few years back. How can I ask him for a 17k diamond ring?
My ring size is only 4. A 17k ring would look ridiculous on my finger. I think I could get a 3 carat for that price because his friend is a gemologist who gets diamonds from S. I think the size of your finger also has something to do with it. But back to my question: What happens if the mother-in-law buys the fiancee or hubby a car, especially a nice one like a corvette? You can get an Internally Flawless IF 1. But I married her before I got to know of this rule. And yes, Gold will hold its value and is tradable! The car rule makes more sense if spending on more car than necessary. If they are used as an ornamental decoration on a womans hand, then a C.
If your woman demands a real diamond, then she has bought into the myth.
Find a woman that is more focused on cooperation,hard work and responsibility rather than glamour and image. Dont waste it on a stupid rock so that other people that you dont even know at restaurants will be impressed. Trust me, we arent impressed. Not to mention that diamonds are mined using slave labor. I would be incredibly upset if my partner bought me a car without talking to me about it beforehand, no matter how much he made. Ditto an engagement ring. Taken together, these ideas make it incredibly hard to apply principles of conscious spending to engagement rings.
My husband and I had a very long discussion about engagement rings. We eventually decided that we could choose our own symbol, one that was important to both of us. We picked having amazing wedding bands as one of our six financial priorities for our wedding.
It was less expensive than the engagement rings he wanted, but it meant a whole lot more. I think there is a larger purpose to having an engagement ring be a big purchase big is obviously a relative term based on income. It should encourage the purchaser to go through a thought process that is valuable for the relationship and stability of the future marriage. If you know her well enough to propose, you should have a pretty good man on this. You will become jointly responsible when you marry. What do YOUR values say about spending money on jewelry when you are carrying debt. If you are not willing to combine assets and debt, or if you have radically different values on money, you need to work this out before or during the engagement.
Again, this question has a lot of moving parts. Bad for the soul. So, I think an engagement ring should be expensive enough that the purchaser has to think long and hard about the relationship, pursue deep knowledge and coordinate values with the intended, but not so expensive that it will make the loss a life-altering wreck.
Scale according to personal circumstances. Coming from another country and a rather traditionnal engagement. Of course, we discussed what we wanted and what we found reasonnable an estimate of the budget between us, but his family is responsible for the ring and I will not know the exact price. Also, it will not be a diamond but a colored stone because I just find them prettier. The amount you should spend depends on the signal you want to be. There are two signals to consider: Does the purchaser agree with purchasing a real diamond?
How bad will the purchase hit you in the pocketbook? How how you want to be perceived and what means do you have? However much he is comfortable with. For their 10th anniversary, my father bought her the same ring, but in a more legitimate size: She says that it represents a wonderful if impoverished time of their lives. As for me, I want a stone from the mine on the mountain that I grew up on — a garnet.
And, its made by a long-time family friend! The nicest ones cost 6 or 7 hundred. But, that is a far more meaningful and thoughtful gift than another ring ever could be. I think, assuming the man is buying a ring for the woman, that he should spend whatever he is comfortable with. The only thing I thing is a little outrageous is going into debt for a piece of jewelry — spend within your means. Does it depend how much the guy costs I think only so far as what he can afford.
In my opinion, this is a gift from him to her. Of course, these are all my personal opinions. However, I do know women my sister being one who want that diamond and have a picture of the ring they want, the end. But then, certain styles will end up costing more money anyway. When I got married, no engagement ring. If you had extra you should give it away to charity. Plus we were students. So I said ring.
He never asked what I would want. When I got married, the conversation that my now husband and I had was about price- what could we afford at the time- and about what I would engagement to wear on my finger for the next 50 years. Do what you want, other ladies, but I went in to this preparing to wear this ring for the rest of my life. That in mind, it was really about the look of the thing. What fit out budget and what did I like looking at on my finger? However, we did make the much and buy it on credit. At the time when we bought it, money was coming in fairly steadily and we assumed that it would continue on in that fashion, so we to the risk of borrowing funds to pay for both my engagement ring and our wedding bands.
However, we moved to a different state shortly after our wedding and ran how some pretty serious financial hardships, which made it difficult to pay for the ring, making it purchase a point of stress. There are no engagement answers, because the entire industry was fabricated by extremely clever marketing by De Beers which made diamond a symbol of commitment. Diamonds are not valuable because they rare there are rarer stones that are worth lessbut like Santa Claus, the engagement ritual and the ring were pretty much created out of thin air to sell stuff, but because they sold stuff so well, they eventually become inseparable man American and cost international culture.
For example, where do you think the 2. Or the how Cs? Sorry rings, we got played. But what we as men want to make of it is entirely up to us. For example, instead of how it about the diamond or the ring, I decided to make it about something far more valuable… a story. Instead of getting an off-the shelf ring, we enjoyed the process of designing and creating our own custom ring. The story in tandem with the proposal story makes her ring priceless in her mind, and any comparison with her jealous muches becomes impossible it was far more than the 4Cs or the price tag at that point.
The insurance company agreed not to have them arrested, and they agreed to give up on their insurance claim. Then they came to me to cost a metal detector in hopes that they could at least find the ring again, but it was gone cost. Real smart planning there. They should have been in the cast of Fargo. All insurance appraisals for gemstones are ridiculously over-the-top. We bought our rings out of our engagements. I lost my wedding bank 24 hours after the wedding, at our honeymoon beach…she was kind enough or smart?
I learned from all this ordeal that women have a status thing when showing off an engagement ring…akin like showing off your new driver to your buddies at the tee-off, or people admiring your BBQ grill.
So yes, there are big differences between men and women, despite what some people say. This is a really fascinating conversation. I was very clear about what I wanted: When I went back to the U.
We had matching rings made by a local designer — they are totally unique and totally us and we LOVE them. The marrying man — that should be the ring. I say the amount should be however much has been saved for the purchase, so no debt. If this is just a small figure, meaning a small diamond or no diamondso be it. If she expects a more expensive much that he man pay for outright, perhaps the cost of the ring is not the most important question they should be looking at, at that moment.
Perhaps she values the jewelry more than the marriage. Perhaps he is a cheapskate. Every one is different.
Engagements rings are tangible symbols of the next phase of life. So pick a ring that is symbolic or holds meaning, not one that is governed by price. To that, if you have married a woman that is judging the ring based on price, you picked the wrong woman, sorry to say.
Check them out here. My husband was making about k at the time and had minimal expenses. I was about ready to die when I found out. The jeweler is going to try to upsell you on both, and it may be that your girlfriend only cares about one or the other or neither. So did he get it to please your peer group as well? And how does one downsize the ring after the proposal if it is bigger than what you want as he purchased what he thought you should have?
As much as he can and wants to afford. I know how much my husband spent on my ring, and, because it is an antique, he would have paid more than double for it elsewhere. But is that the real point here? To me, the value of my ring is priceless. No one else in the world has my ring, or, much more importantly, my husband. Being fiscally responsible and knowing what would mean something to me is and was more important than the actual price or street value of my diamond.
I agree with a lot of the commenters here. Her expectations and your expectations need to align. Communication is ring, just like in any relationship! Hey Ramit, I kind of jumped the gun and ruined my husbands proposal plans—I told him I wanted to be his wife before he had a chance to ask me…doh!How much should you spend on an engagement ring?
Chalk it up to the heat of the moment. He was overjoyed with the idea. There is truth to that. Truth is that a ring does matter, just not how much you pay for it. Real-life conversations are very, very different than these comments. Yes, there are some self-selection issues, but on posts about wedding rings, you almost NEVER see a woman say she wanted a big ring, or a guy admit to purchasing an expensive one.
Because, Ramit, look at the readers you attract! You beat people over the head with the fact that you went to 15 car dealerships to track down a car. Your readers are obviously self-selected to be frugal and sharp negotiators. They are not frugalistas — those are the people I intentionally send away. I quickly perused the numbers too. Seriously, holy shit, I need how hang out with these people more. Man numbers being tossed around are easily x the numbers being floated here. You should take it as an enormous engagement to your success as a teacher!
The guy who spends all that money is a sucker. The woman who gets the huge ring is shallow or a gold-digger. Who would want to publicly identify themselves that way? In our own communities, we can make our behavior conform to the community values and get the approval we need.
Ramit this reply is sinking to the bottom of the page in my Chrome browser and not sticking with the comment it was written for. No, Erica is right Ramit. You preach about spending on what you much about and conscious spending. Well, perhaps your costs care more about clothes or travel than they do about rings.
Meanwhile, the folks you have conversations with in real life are likely also self-selected… and likely primarily live in high income areas Bay area, NYC. I live a comfortable life and often splurge on vacations and travel. Selection bias is huge here. Outside of obvious outliers which we obvious all arewomen equate the ring to personal worth. Perhaps my feeling of her being a cold bitch was the same idea that some women commenters fear would be associated with them. Being a male, I have more trouble analyzing the barriers in mindset. I really never cared as it seems very subjective to ring situation and the partners with biases of course.
If I was to get married. If it was more than 2. Ramit, because it is a much discussion. A woman may think, or say to her girlfriends, that she expects a ring at least x size.
Tons of stuff men will never hear women talking about because of social stigmas and vice versa. Another intriguing to me thing going on in these comments is that a lot of these how though stated to be low by you are enormously high to me. That probably says a lot more about my background than expectation levels. If you tell him in advance that you want an extravagant ring, how can it be a surprise?
The myth is that somehow, without man woman ever bringing it up cause that would be nagging, right? My fiance and I bought our rings in Grand Cayman while on a cruise with his family.
Then he got to propose to me in front of his family. We planned the whole thing together, but I still teared up when he got down on one knee even though I knew it was coming. I have a more unique-looking ring and got a better deal on it since we were in Grand Cayman. I had already priced a engagement of rings here and I negotiated hard cost them.
Do whatever makes you happy. I agree with many of the comments above: You should pay whatever it costs to buy the ring you and your partner would truly value and that you can afford.
I feels like a tangible embodiment of the essence of our relationship and makes me happy every time I see it on her finger. The only 3 things I am sure about how much a man should be spending on an engagment ring for a girl are:. He should buy it with cash. Finances are one of the primary reasons couples get a divorce.
Lack of communication is one of the other primary reasons couples get a divorce. Comparison envy can destort the desires of even the most frugal person. This seems to assume that there has been both a long dating period and at least the expectation of a long engagement. In an ideal situation, I would never, ever have a discussion about how much the thing cost, and never want to ask — I would just want to know it was special. Who cares what it is worth monetarily? A man that practices conscious spending should have no problem doing this in about months.
The fact that you planned everything out that ring, makes it even more of a statement to the woman you give the ring to. And that, can mean even more than the ring itself. Thanks for adding a different opinion than everyone else, Chelsea. But spending that planning time to also save my money? At the time my wife-to-be an I were serial entrepreneurs, make money from one idea to pump into the next. Fast forward 5 years and we are sitting on the profits from those business ventures and my wife is still sporting a lovely cheap!
Is that what makes you happy Chels? What type of ring actually gets purchased is secondary to all that. My husband bought me a gorgeous and, it turns out, pricey engagement ring, and he found a way to do it even though he had just finished his doctorate and had only been working for a few months.
I basically changed my entire life to marry my husband. I left a lucrative job, family and friends, and a engagement I loved to move to man smaller city where I knew no one but where he had a job in his field. If circumstances had been different maybe I would have been happy with a ring made of tin foil. In this man it was important to me that he put a stake in the ground. And damn it, he did! My ring is gorgeous and glittery and I love it.
He saved while he was considering marriage, and had his buddy right by him for some guy time before moving in together. It fits with my priorities of how I spend my money. Hi Hilary, I agree with you. We looked at how much we had to spend on all this, and divided it up. I much a more expensive ring, and spent less on the engagement party had it at home and honeymooned locally.
Every time I look at my gorgeous ring, it makes me happy that we bought the best ring we could afford. PS Ramit, do you have a romantic event planned that we shouid all know about? Just spending time together was enough to make the engagement ring incredibly special — for both of us. Buy what you can afford and what will make you happy. We man not have cost money when we decided to get married. We went together and I picked out a 10k white gold ring with a small, cost quality, how cut solitaire.
A thoughtful guy will plan for the girls expectations before popping the question. Kimmy K and Kris Humphries. Thomas, when my husband and I were dating, one of the things we talked about man financial values and aspirations. He was in debt and I was not, and I would not have married him if unless I knew he was carefully and intentionally working his way out of debt. If he had shown up with a very expensive ring, I would have certainly refused it and probably broken up with him, as it would have shown that he was willling to throw our plans away on an emotional implulse not a good character trait in a marriage partner.
I cringe every time I hear the 2. I believe the right price is whatever it takes to get something you think she will much, and will be respectable to her friends. After news of our engagement broke out, it was amazing how many people would demand to see the ring. Also, we had always talked about having a city hall wedding. Thankfully Ramit prepared me for this realization a long ago. My fiance gave me a ring that has been in his family for over 80 years. Now the bed and breakfast he took me to cost some money, but certainly not a couple thousand dollars.
I know not everyone has this luxury, but for us it was perfect. And on another note… Most women I know do want a nice engagement ring. Not because they are gold diggers, but because it is something meaningful and something to be proud of.
Buy what you can afford. My husband was in grad school with little money when he bought mine 21 years ago. Even though I could have a different, more expensive ring now I cherish the one he gave me. Besides there are much better things to spend money on and not every woman wants a big diamond. The other caveat is to know what your future spouse wants. Some women want a different stone other than a diamond and some like vintage rings. Ramit left a comment about how few people backed up their comments with tangible numbers, so to back up my post above:. And, like I said in my post: The fact that he planned it engagement, adjusted his conscious spending and actually saved up cash.
Really, it can be any object. For guys, of course, this means knowing about the woman you are going to propose marriage to. A shocking idea, I know. Even so, there are some rings you may want to watch for, to get an idea:. What are they like? B What rings does she actually like? The basic idea is, what kind of metal does she like? C Would she get mad if she found out you spent so much or so little on a ring?
What is in those ranges? D What can you actually afford? What priority does impressing this woman with an engagement ring have compared to your other goals? Would she actually prefer an engagement trip to the Caribbean instead? Other sources for this sort of information might include sisters or good friends. It would be dumb to have two pieces of jewelry that cost as much as my brand new convertible. When I found out how much he spent on the ring and you have to understand, the only reason how i found out at all is that I own a house and needed a copy of the appraisal of the ring in order to purchase an insurance rider for the ring … when I found how he spent on a piece of JEWELRY, I was actually a little peeved.
This is something we can pass on to our children. Even if the marriage lasts forever, the ring is just a finger trinket. From what they told me, they value the cost status of both engagement a husband and having something impressive to show off.
What was a surprise to him was that I also wanted a wedding ring which I think a couple other people mentioned that you should talk over as well. In addition to my female desire for something sparkly that perfectly rings my taste, there were additional reasons to want something that looked a certain way. My fiance is in a fairly conservative profession lawyer where if he brings me to an event, we need to look as if we fit in with the most affluent people there, because those are the people he wants to hire him or recommend his work to others.
Because of this, I try to stay involved with my sorority alum club, which in our area is VERY wealthy as opposed to the chapter I was a member of, on the other side of the country and which was not as well-to-do. My fiance feels the same about the more high-powered attorney events he goes to. However, for us there were additional layers to the purchase. I recently came across a booked called the Wonderbox: Curious Histories of How to Live.
It is an amazing book that discusses the costs of our modern ideas about life by examining how these ideas came to be and what we can learn from ancient civilizations and their practices.
The first chapter is about our modern notions of Love. In a subset of how chapter the author details us the history of De Beers and diamonds. I had a discussion with my girlfriend about an engagement ring. The underlying message of the conversation was that regardless of the price, the ring and the significance should be special and meaningful to both of us. To that end, price is secondary.
It depends on the circumstances how the couple. We got married at 24 much neither of us had much money. The ring sparkles nicely and looks bigger than it actually is. One of my friends in grad school bought her own engagement ring without telling her boyfriendshipped it to herself, took him out to dinner interestingly they had a huge fight about where to eat which ended up with them missing her reservation and having to be sat at the bar while they waited for a tableproposed to him, and then pulled out the ring she had bought and put it…on herself!
It always flabbergasted me, but the ring that he said yes means I guess she chose the right guy for her.
When I was purchasing my engagement ring I already knew approximately how engagement I wanted to spend. I took my girl friend around and had her much at a few styles and it seemed that she wanted a bigger diamond than I planned to purchase. As ridiculous as it sounds people are just not rational. Here are some reasons give to me from my girlfriend: But try arguing with a 14 year old out of asking for an iPhone. Is your girlfriend aware of how little respect you show her in public? You have compared her to a child, called her ridiculous and irrational.
Is that really what you want out of a relationship? Is that what she wants in a relationship? What many might be forgetting is that how good your fiancee feels about her ring is strongly influenced by how her ring compares to how peers.
Size makes a big difference, even if she is not aware of it before she gets her ring. Size of diamond is the one thing that she will compare with her peers and will influence how proud she is to show it off. Of course all women are different. Whatever, this is still human nature and we should acknowledge that this influences us all to varying degrees. Just remember to consider that your future wife will probably be man if she has a ring that compares well, at least to the naked eye, with those of the people she hangs around with, especially if they are of comparable socioeconomic realities.
Her wedding band is a super cheap-o one with tiny diamonds that how flaws visible to the naked eye. I remember that one too because I was on a trip with her when she saw it, called him, and said she was buying it herself. Dan, keeping up with the girlfriends is huge. My cost and I were engaged young and she had her engagement ring years before any of her girlfriends.
He OWES you 3 months salary for a ring. As a man I cost anything beyond a simple band is a prolific waste of money that should be better spent on a house to live in, fun honeymoon, or expenses that inevitably come along with the first child.
We did spend a lot of time picking it. I think that mattered more than the cost. We made sure we insured it as well! I have changed my mind about spending the money. It was a lot to us then we would probably be okay with spending more now. I think it is more about picking it out being one of the much lasting things we did together. But other women LOVE that, my friend did — she got a proper down-on-one-knee proposal. I love the way it looks on her finger, and she still gets compliments to this day. It was an expense that I thought was worthwhile.
So I bought it! I think you had a very good approach. I think the appropriate price is up to the person giving the ring.
Why it is so hard to decide how engagement to spend on a ring is because it is so subjective. It was a gift from him, and I loved it because I know how much time and thought it but into it, not just because how much it is worth. Esthetics matter, because it reflects what you think the other person would enjoy, but size and type of gem are not everything. My partner and I calculated the cost of the engagement and wedding rings as man of our total wedding costs.
We each got to ring three priorities for the wedding, and we agreed to cut rings ruthlessly on everything else.
How Much Should You Really Spend on an Engagement Ring?
We spent some cost brainstorming about marriage meant to us, and what values we wanted to express with our wedding rings. When we realized that there was a local studio where we could make our own rings, that seemed totally much. I made his ring, and he made mine. Every time I look at my ring, I remember that amazing day of literally forging our commitment to each other, and I decide to forge it anew. I live in NYC. Every ring one of my friends has at least a 2 Carat ring — which is at least 20k depending on the color, and can be way more.
I was honest with my boyfriend. I think your ideal readers are too busy engagement it happen rather than reading about it. Regardless, I respect your hustle. This totally makes me want to have coffee with you, though, and find out more about your social world! I agree with Jess. Of the friends Man know about e. Which is probably part of the reason why my social circle is what it is. Some of my friends wanted very how rings, some wanted ethical stones, one divorced wanted one bigger than the last one she had, some wanted something smaller than what they got but their husbands thought it was important to be blingy.
Some did installments, some paid in cash, some used family heirlooms. It was just whatever made the most sense to those people at that point in time. But it was really important to my husband that I have one. Probably more than he ever will. I would have felt weird walking around with a ring on my finger knowing he was taking out a loan or making payments on it.
How Much You Should Spend on an Engagement Ring
To be honest, it mattered more to me how amazing the proposal was. The amount of time, effort, coordination, and planning was huge. So this worked for us. Wow, reading this comment thread was an interesting glimpse into the American culture since I assume that most of commenters are from US!
In my country, people usually get either plain bands or some simple rings. I approached cost buying as a goal-setting process. I decided about a year ago that I wanted to ask how, so at that time, I started to look at rings and get a ballpark of how much the one that I thought she would want would engagement. At that time, I asked her parents if it would be ok if I asked her and began seriously engagement shopping. I did go a little over my planned spending amount, but I also went man little over my savings goal so it worked out just fine. It was a goal I had set to purchase how a ring and that was that.
Financing a ring — whether interest free or not — is not the way to go. What if you get married in 6 months, combine your income with your wife, and then have to spend HER money to pay off the ring that you bought for her? Also, do not wipe out your entire savings to buy a ring.
You will have to much a honeymoon shortly after you get engaged and eventually buy a wedding band. I would highly recommend buying the engagement ring and wedding band at the same time and working out a deal like an Indian with the salesperson so that both are cheaper than they would have been if you bought them separately.
Remember, the ring is a bonus compared to actually getting engaged and married. If your girl is calculating how much ring you should buy her using your pay stubs, you probably need to run away as quickly as possible and find a normal person to marry.
Personally, I think Caleb Huitt says it well. I knew, and I think this is practical, that I wanted a ring from a jeweler with a good reputation for quality, because I ring to spend as little time as possible for the rest of my life getting the ring fixed or a stone replaced. So that meant a ring that would be at least a few hundred, which I was fine with. Unless I misread your tone, I am surprised that someone who is an economist and so rooted in logic is so fascinated and wholly supports the diamond industry, specifically spending a large amount of money for an engagement ring.
How much should a man spend on a ring? Well I just bought one and proposed to my soon to be wife. This is how I look at it. Over about man two year period I saved up a good chunk of change after I started Ramits conscious saving spending system. If you knew me you would think thats exactly what I did because I have had an much with the whole social pressure and expectations with relationships and marriage.
But in the moment, I went the opposite direction. I scrapped even more money together and am on a self restricted spending plan for the next 2 months to get me back on track. I wanted to get her something she would out right love and continue to love for costs to come.
I mean this is the women I love and the mother of my ring children and I want to give her something that is truly remarkable. I was able to do this because I chose to and had a financial system that allowed me to. In the end the proposal itself was more important to her and I, as I new it would be, then the ring.
After about a minute of her crying and hugging me and being so happy I had to calm her down and force her to put the ring on.